I am sick of opening and closing blinds throughout the day as the Sun gets in my eyes whilst I’m sat at my desk. I therefore demand our scientists and engineers stop the Earth rotating. I’m thinking some giant rockets pushing in the opposite direction. Or possibly acquire a new moon orbiting in the opposite direction to the Earth's rotation and of sufficient mass to trim the speed off.

Yes. yes, if it stopped suddenly we’d have 1000mph+ winds as the atmosphere continued its rotation. And, yes, even if we stopped it gradually all the sea water would go to the poles. Think of the benefits though: you could walk from Africa to America (unless Trump builds a very big wall indeed and gets the Africans to pay for it). Sure, we’d also get six months day and six months night with the temperature ranging from 100C to very chilly indeed.

True, most life on Earth would probably be wiped out, our compasses might stop working and the weather would be a bit freaky, but instead of whinging on about it let's take the risk and find some solutions.

Just so long as I don’t keep getting the Sun in my eyes.